Friday, December 31, 2010

*** Happy New Year - MMXI ***




2010 was quite a good year of learning.

It was the year when one learnt that...
  • driving the black car is easy (yes! got one at last!)
  • singing a new National Anthem is tough (Pink Card now!)
  • slaying the PSLE demon finally is possible (Not me! Still, what a relief!)
  • Wiki stands for 'What I Know Is' but yet does not know why Assange had to do the voyeuristic bit for History!
  • to pronounce Eyjafjallajökull is akin to putting your tongue through the wringer (what is the population of Iceland again? I have a vague suspicion that the Icelanders provoked the said-volcano to spew ash so that they can divert the world's attention away from their economic woes!)
  • QE2 is not the luxury liner, but a luxurious credit line for the banks to ease people quantitatively (:-|)
  • Dabaang is a very good movie (Plzzzzz!)
  • while one can opt-out of the casinos in Singapore, it may not be possible to do so when visiting shady sites!
  • Singapore pays its students just for attending Secondary school and beyond
  • work increases ten-fold when the project slows down and
  • the Spanish were deaf to Vuvuzela!

Ole 2010!!

Welcome 2011!!

Please plant and tend a tree in this Year of Forests!!

Have a Healthy, Happy and Prosperous New Year!!!

For the Tamil aficionados, here are the greetings!

Friday, December 24, 2010

Manmathan Ambu: Emperor's Clothes :-{}

For a Tamil review, visit here.

In the GE world, Jack Welch introduced the culling of bottom 10% every year. The euphemistic management expression for this was that the 'bar was being raised every year'. The same goes with Kamal's movies as well. If you proclaim to make good movies and to give better film experiences to the Tamil philistines that we are, then the bar is pegged higher all the time.

In the last decade, every movie that Kamal has scripted - with the exception of Hey Ram! and to a certain extent Anbe Sivam, has been a damp squib. In corporate parlance, we call it OCUD - Over Commit; Under Deliver!

Don't get me wrong! I like Kamal's cerebral approach to movies. I really enjoy it. Even his combo with Crazy used to be highly enjoyable intellectually. But when Kamal takes the pen and starts writing, his thoughts over-flow and ends up flooding people's senses. B said this about dialogue writing: If a hand-written piece of dialogue is more than three lines, then you have lost your audience. Very true! (but then, you don't need the mono-syllable offerings by Mani Ratnam as well!)

In Manmathan Ambu, Kamal attempts to put in a lot of intelligence into the dialogues through the various protagonists: A case in point is when Trisha compares the connecting door in her caravan to the zipper in your trousers or the hook in the blouse - it is there just to ensure that we are not exhibiting anything. Believe me, typing this much, I got tired. How will it be, for someone to hear that on the screen? By the time the first five words are done, the audience starts yawning...

Oh, by the way, the movie is not based on Hitch. Apologies for leading you down the garden path; well the Singapore newspapers were led down the garden path actually. Reminds me of one of B's all-time cracker a few years ago: The only truth in the newspapers are the obituaries!

In reality it is very loosely based on 'Romance on the High Seas'. A very old movie, I believe (Thanks Guru for pointing that out!).

For about 2.5 hours the movie was like a gentle breeze across the meadows on a steamy afternoon. Cool and refreshing. Slow, it was; but the different milieu - film stars, European divorcee, private detective etc, pithy dialogues, subdued and natural performance from the various characters made it a joy especially after the sound and fury of Endhiran.

And then just when you thought that you are going to get a straight-from-the-heart movie, Kamal gets cold feet and drags the movie to his tried-and-tested slap-stick comedy route. In Delhi they used to call it as KLPD. I will not expand that. This is a family site, after all.

If Mynaa (Udhay bought that movie after all; net net, he might make more on that movie than this!), proves that good stories/treatment can run irrespective of the stars and commercial pressures, then when are the jambavans of Tamil cinema such as Kamal going to push the 'envelope'?

No half measures such as 'faulty live recording', 'grainy digital video recording'...please!

One good piece in this movie was the song Neela Vaanam which shows Kamal's married life in reverse a la  Return to Innocence by Enigma.

Manmathan Ambu is good in very few parts. Otherwise it is disappointing. It is almost as if that Kamal is the Emperor who has no clothes and no one has the courage to tell him that his scripting needs finishing. Probably he needs the little kid from the movie to tell him the truth in the real life as well :-|||

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Await

...another 16 hours for the review of the much-awaited movie of the year (tongue firmly in cheek!)...
Copied or not, we have to pay the thandal...

Friday, December 03, 2010

Manmathan Ambu (Story Outline)




For those of you who were cribbing about the tamil post on this topic, here we go...

Dr Mannar is the 'date doctor' who helps Maddy (mostly called as Madhan) to 'phatao' movie star Trisha. In the mean time, love happens and no body knows who is loving who as the movie is likely to travel in the high seas in the cruise liner across Europe.

Why Europe? Why not in Singapore? It can be cheaper you know?

These were Kamal's words to producer Udhay (heir to billions in Tamil Nadu) and U reportedly said that the movie has to have a rich feeling - and the result? Thou shall watch Europe in a real rich vein...

Oh, by the way, if the outline reminds you of the movie 'Hitch', then it is not my problem. Neither is it Kamal's problem. It is only the viewer's problem.

After all, this is what Mishkin said after being accused of lifting from 'Kikujiro' for his masterpiece Nandalala: "Watch my movie as a stand-alone. Don't compare it with anything else, even if it were lifted off Kikujiro." I can salute Mishkin for one thing - at least, he is trying to bring in a classic to Tamil and introduce good cinema to the mind-less masses, but what about Kamal? Remakes of Hollywood commercial trashes... Sigh!

A miracle that refused, refuses, probably will refuse (?) to happen...

PS: That last line is from Charu.

Source: Singapore newspapers who covered the audio release also had a very brief outline with some masala from yours truly...

Sunday, October 03, 2010

Endhiran: Seeing is Believing!


For a general time-pass in Tamil on Endhiran you may want to go here. Now read on for the review in English...

I was telling this joke to Aishu this morning.

There were these two bearded gentlemen – one a proud Maratha and the other a gallant Sikh, travelling by train from Mumbai to Delhi. The compartment was empty and they got bored and decided to play a game. Each one would name an Indian Freedom fighter from their native land and will get to pull a hair out of the other one’s beard. Within minutes, it was apparent that the Sardarji was going to lose all his hair as the Marathi was reeling off the Tilaks and Gokhales as if there was no tomorrow. But then Sardarjis are nothing if not shrewd; in one brilliant move, the Sikh shouted, “Jallianwala Bagh!!” and pulled the entire beard off the Marathi’s face!!!

All ye Rajini detractors: Please do not play the above game with the Rajini fans hereafter. Before even you can start listing the Nayagans and the Gunas and the Anbe Sivams, you will hear a big shout – ‘Endhiran!’ and that is it; you are sure to lose, not just the facial hair… ok, this is a family site!

One went to Rex Cinemas in Singapore on Gandhi Jayanthi afternoon to watch Thalivar’s latest offering.

Full tummy? Tick.
Sleepy? Tick.
Pounding head-ache? Tick.
Heavy heart? Tick. (Why? Could not watch the movie 44 hours earlier :-()

As one entered the theatre, B was quite unhappy to see (a) a number of empty seats and (b) a number of families amongst the audience. What? 2nd day Rajini movie – empty seats? No buzz…Hayyooo :-((

Anyway, one decided to wait for the movie to start and start it did at 4pm.

The pace, the novelty, the relentless set-pieces, dashing visuals, intelligent dialogues and above all Rajini’s histrionics - it was like watching the first-ever ODI double century early this year by that Rajini of the cricket field, Sachin!

The next thing one knew was that the movie had ended! (I vaguely remember getting the pop-corn during the intermission – must have been vision-bleached!)

The story, as you would have read in all reviews is quite straight-forward.

Man creates Robot. Robot obeys Man – to the dot that is until Man gives feelings to Robot. Robot begins to go after Man’s lover. Man kills Robot. Robot comes back and creates havoc. Man worms, de-magnetizes, magnetizes and finally destructs Robot. 

There is a very poignant end to the movie which is bound to make you come out of the hall with questions about relationships!

One hears that Sujatha had pretty much done the story and dialogue at least ten years ago. Remember his Jeeno story series (two of them)? Still quite fresh!  Also heard that Shankar had to employ an army of 250 people to kinda update the whole piece to make it a bit more contemporary (1 TerraHertz, 1 Zettabyte etc.) Hmmm… what was Sujatha’s IQ again?

Rajini completely rules the roost. It is hard to imagine how Kamal would have fared in this role based on the initial casting. Neither would Shah Rukh have cut it. Rajini is the suave Dr Vaseegaran de Man and the Robot who himself has multiple incarnations - innocent(?) Chitti, love-smitten Chitti, scheming Chitti, menacing Chitti and the wise Chitti.

Prosthetics or not, he looks dashing and as usual, steals the thunder when he turns the villain in the second-half.

Yes, he does not spew out any one-liners; in fact Ash even makes fun of his ‘thanee vazhi’ dialogue. Rajini’s parents exactly have 90 seconds of screen-time. So do others – in fact that mosquito ‘Rangooski’, Sujatha’s nick-name, occupies more celluloid real-estate than Karunas, Santhanam, Haneefa and Kalabhavan Mani all put together!  But one never notices these things. In the larger scheme of things, Rajini rules and that is all that matters!

Ash manages to hold onto the fast ride without much of a problem. She is definitely the most beautiful 35-year old in the world. No tongue-in-cheek there!

Yes, there are six songs including the mandatory adrenaline-pumper before the climax. Machu-Pichu is breath-taking and so is Ash in that song ;-) By the way, where was the Kadhal Anukkal song picturized? Dead Sea or one of those deserts in South America?

The movie is heavy on human relationships with quite an interesting characterization throughout.

Dr Vaseegaran does not reciprocate the ‘right feelings’ towards a beauty like Ash (aaarghh! blind or what?), Sana cheats and lies in the exam hall, the two side-kick scientists double-cross, Dr Bohra covets and pollutes Chitti… and all these are more than enough for an intelligent robot like Chitti to absorb and he ends up spewing love poetry on Sana!! Natural? You bet. Everybody seems to be doing the right thing at that moment without realizing how it is impacting the new-born robot.

The movie is heavy on technology. The jargons will not kill you. If you don’t understand them, fret not. Apart from missing a few insider jokes about IP Address, Nickel bolts etc., they are just there to give you a Sci-Fi feeling. The CGI is mind-blowing, on par, and at times better than other Hollywood movies. Remember the CGI was done by various Hollywood organizations and the proof-of-the-pudding could be seen at the end of the movie: for a full three minutes, the names of the people who did CGI, from India to US to China to India, just kept rolling on and on.

As a director Shankar has excelled himself this time around. While he could easily have made this into a mindless action flick (and still raked in the moolah!), one can see that he has struggled hard to get a complex script to the screen and has greatly succeeded in doing so. Hats off, mate!
Sivaji was a Rajini movie directed by Shankar.
Endhiran is a Shankar movie with Rajini acting in it.
Which director has done that with Rajini in the last two decades at least?
What do I hear? Chandramukhi? I cringe.

Leaving thoughts:

With or without Carpet Bombing Strategy, everybody associated with making Endhiran will become richer.

B was not too satisfied in the end. He mentioned something pertinent. Usually in a Rajini movie, people come to watch a human being do the extra-ordinary and they probably see themselves doing those acts. In Endhiran, Rajini does more fantastic things than they could ever have imagined – but it is not real you see: a man doing super-man stuff and a super-man doing super-man stuff has differences, right? I think that is what made him say, “I hope that this movie runs well, so that Rajini can come back for a Baasha-2!”

As far as I am concerned…

Forget all that psycho-analysis baloney.

Go watch Endhiran.

Twice.

Dot.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Nut Crackers #3: Locksmiths!


If you have employed these species for their esoteric services, you would have realized that even the most un-yielding locks would open up like 7-11 at their hands, with one of those small pin like contraption. On top of it, invariably, the lock would have to be replaced. And worse still, one’s purse also lightens up so fast that you literally want to starve for a week to save up the money. What to do?

But this locksmith who came home last week, proved to be a good-fun guy. After the customary 10-second trick, he went on to regale the females of the household with a few funny locked-out anecdotes.

One of which was a cracker:

Apparently, there was an altercation between a husband and wife. The Young and Feisty wife, seeing that she was not winning the argument stormed out of the room. Disturbed because of the rarity of the event – the husband winning the argument over wife, that is – she banged the door close on her way out, leaving the husband to gloat secretly on his success.

Fifteen minutes later, mollified, she knocked the door calling out the husband for a quick dinner at the nearby hawker centre. Chicken rice to the soul, perhaps.

Unfortunately, the husband would not open the door and to add insult to injury, he even claimed that he could not open the door as the door was stuck!

Remember the wife being Y & F? She renewed the hostilities with the poor sod through the wooden door. But no, the hubby could not open the door. How impertinent of him?

The Y & F called the – no, not the locksmith but, the police claiming that the hubby was harassing her mentally by not opening the door. The blues came up and after a number of threats to the hubby…

“You will be put in jail!” (Where do you think I am now?)
“You will lose your house!” (First get me out of the room!)
“You will be divorced from your wedlock!” (Open this stupid lock, please!)

…they realized that he was possibly speaking the truth. Our dear locksmith was summoned as an expert and witness and after the usual sleight of hand, the hubby and wife reunited – and they are living happily everafter, probably.

PS: Locksmith mentioned that he gets more business if the couples are young or if the flat is on a high-floor or if the month is December. See the connection: Doors slam when it is quite windy!

******
Didn't I say that writing in 100 words is quite tough. In just the third attempt, the word count went four times higher! Try, I shall...

Nut Crackers #2: EQ & Eugenics

With a 17-year old in the house, girls and dating can’t be far off from any discussion. B narrated this about a friend’s predicament in his class.


B’s friend M is a top-notch academics guy. Class first; world debating champion; no position is difficult for him to defend blah, blah, blah. And he wants to go to Oxford or Cambridge, with scholarship. Naturally. With this in the background, read on.

M: Hey B! What do you think about xyz? Can I approach her for a date?

B: Why this sudden interest in xyz, M?

M: No la! All these stupid scholarship boards not only look at IQ, they want to see your EQ as well! And I want to shore it up, you see!

B: Oh ok. She is fine and you can be a socialist with xyz. (Lingo for being less-volatile and steady)

M: (suddenly remembering something) Hey! Is she applying for Oxbridge?

B: (thinks for a nano-second) No. Why?

M: Aiyah! That is not good. She should be Oxbridge material, man!

B: Look here. What is important? EQ or Eugenics? If you want your love life to be driven by Eugenics then you need to forget not only xyz but a to w as well!!

M: (in a resigned tone) OK la! For now EQ wins….

PS: Boys will be boys. M apparently is so-smitten by xyz that he is sure of his EQ touching 150+ :-)

Nut Crackers #1: F1 Road Closure


No, this is not an attempt to sell any kitchen appliances or torture instruments - not much of a difference between the two though. Just an honest attempt to write in around 100 words about something that cracked us up. Very tough!

*******

As I was sleepily guiding the black behemoth yesterday morning towards the daughter’s school, there was this radio news item that caught our attention. “Singapore would experience low road closures this year during the F1 race!”

That set the tone for the next 300 seconds (that is the time that it takes for me to drive about 600 metres to the school!).

D somehow heard it as ‘Singapore would experience NO road closures this year during the F1 race!” (Happens if you hear it in the vernacular and you are sufficiently sleep-deprived) and her next comment really cracked it:

“So these drivers have to worry less about the speeds and bends but more about the traffic lights!”

Friday, July 23, 2010

Taxi... Taxi...

Tomes have been written about the woes of taxi-using public in Singapore. But this one really takes the cake.

Yesterday, after an exhilarating and an inebriating evening at Clarke Quay, RR leaves the restaurant to go back home as soon as possible.

He gets into a cab; says "Punggol" and promptly dozes off.

After about 10 minutes, through the alcohol-hazed eyes looks out for familiar spots.

You know the drill - when you are sleeping in the vehicle (not while driving, that is!) the GPS inside the brain always runs and tells your mind that you should have reached Toa Payoh, Ang Mo Kio etc etc.

Now what did RR see... Clementi!! But before he could protest, he was already seeing Jurong. After all the expressways are meant to be clipped at at 90 kmph, aren't they?

Two things:
1. For those of you who are not geographically challenged, in Singapore to go to Punggol from Clarke Quay one kind of goes North-East; but what RR saw were all in South-South-West direction.
2. Yes, there was booze in the party. But it definitely did not explain the change of sign-boards!!

With great concern, RR asks the cab driver, "Are we going to Punggol?" (Communication Lesson 101: Clarify and Confirm); to which the cabbie vigourously replies "Yes!"

Having c&c -ed, RR goes about correcting the course (no pun intended) of the driver's action. When he told him about the 'slight' directional anomaly of the driver's navigational abilities, the cabbie got thoroughly nervous. By the time all this happened, they had already reached Boon Lay - if you go Wester, you end up in the sea ;-)

After what seemed like a million turns and u-turns, the course was corrected and RR returned home.

Here is the receipt as a proof. By far, this is the longest distance (& highest fare) that I have ever seen on a taxi bill in Singapore. I believe that the poor driver was so apologetic that he took only $15 from RR which is par for the course.



And just to give you an idea of the route...



So, next time I sit in the passenger seat, acting as the navigator for the wife, I will remind myself of the day when RR went to Boon Lay to reach Punggol!!!

PS: One thing I do NOT want to see is Comfort penalizing the poor driver for this!

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Not Espana - but En Pasa!

Reams and reams have been written about the passing ability of the Spaniards.

Nothing captures that spirit than the 12th and 13th seconds of the video in the link below. It just comes so naturally !!!




Forget Puyol's bare torso!!

Ole, Ole, Kamama!!

P.S. Police were called yesterday in the apartment block next to mine. For what? Nice residents complained that there was too much noise and disturbance as some children were kicking a soccer ball around!!! How do you expect the talent to grow? People in Singapore good only for criticizing their sportspersons from the comfort of their arm-chairs & of course, to go and bet whereever there is a better odd! Aaaargh!

Monday, May 17, 2010

Le Figaro!

After all that...



This brings us to the end of a very good cricketing season which started with the CCT09, coasted through IPL3 and then limped to a final halt in WCT20.

It was great fun.

There were 12 questions in CCT09, 25 in IPL3 and 7 in WCT20.

And the various winners are:

...drumrolls please...

CCT09: Yadavalli (1st) Amar, Anand Re & Bob (2nd)
IPL3: Siva* (1st) Guru (2nd)
WCT20: Siva* (1st) Anand Re & Ishan (2nd)

Congratulations folks!



After the IPL3, the charity counter is at $147.03. And from WCT20-BQ, Laks (thanks!) has already committed his winnings to charity. Just to recollect, we donated $100 to Singapore Red Cross after CCT09!

And here is the copy of the receipt of the amount that was donated to Project Give of SINDA. (updated on 5/4/11)





Settlement instructions via email.


Thanks and keep up the good work!

Be good and stay healthy!

Inger-Lund, Inger-Lund, Inger-Lund!


No, I have not joined the England soccer patriots! It is just that they played such wonderful cricket over the last two weeks that before you could sing the title, the opponents were blown away. In reality, the only tough game they had was against the Windies. 60 off 6, in retrospect especially after that Hussey Hurricane, is a walk in the park, these days.

Having said that, KP has proved to be a one in a million, what with the new family arrival and all that.

Yes, you can find fault with Collingwood persisting with Yardy for that one additional over or Kieswetter's(what a name!) ugly swipe at Johnson when he wanted to go home in a hurry... but in a first world level victory over the last 35 years, there is no one to blame.

It was funny that Michael Clarke came in at No.3; I almost thought that he was having an alphabetical lineup but then Watson and Warner do not precede Clarke, right? Anyways, Clarke himself has accepted that he is no good in T20. Wish other super stars are hearing that.

Collingwood led from the front and that superb split-second timing catch to dismiss his counterpart was pure magic :-))

Enjoy, dear Pommies! It was a well deserved victory and the English bull-dog spirit was in exhibition aplenty.

That brings us to the end of WCT20 - BQ series.

Oh, forgot!

The answer to the last question is.... wait a minute. I seem to have inadvertently given the answers in the write-up above. Find them out!

Siva*, Rambo and Ganesh Kumar got all five of them correct. There were a few 4.5s and a 4 as well.



Overall, Siva* got all right in this edition - 11 points. Congratulations.

Anand Re and Ishan are the runners up with 9.5 points.

All three of them get a prize.

Other admin details to follow via email.

Thanks for keeping me on the toes. Off to some rest.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

SALUTE Mr Cricket!!!


Legend has it that John Wright, that gem of a coach, took the Indians on a movie night to watch 'Remember The Titans' ahead of that greatest of test series in 2000 against Australia. Apparently, the movie kindled the Indians so much that they pulled not one, but two rabbits out of their hats in Kolkata and Chennai.

Move over, 'Remember The Titans'!

Enter 'Hussey's Hurricane at St Lucia'!!

There is no better way to exemplify the spirit of Australians on the sporting arena than to exhibit this innings again and again to all those under-achievers!

See the sequence of RRR: 80 off 6, 70 off 5; 56 off 4; 48 off 3; 34 off 2 and 18 off 1.

I cannot imagine any team other than Australia to have achieved this. The only other team that would not have thrown in the towel under such circumstances was actually bowling :-))

It was sad that Pakistan could not make it. Over the last two years, these are guys who have played less cricket than your average club cricketer from Singapore. You have people being banned for life, years; you have your economy on the brink; your country has pressure from all sides; yet, they not only survived the chaos, but they seem to have thrived in the chaos to reach the semis yet again & miss the finals by the proverbial cat's whisker!

One was ecstatic to have watched such a beaut of a game; Ended up waking people up to blurt the result out - only to be met with 'Oh, ok. Gotta sleep. Don't disturb!'. BKJAKS (Bandar kya jaane adrath ki swaad?)


Read this gem from cricinfo and it just about sums up the whole spirit behind.

"Australianism," wrote Arlott 62 years ago, "means single-minded determination to win - to win within the laws but, if necessary, to the last limit within them. It means where the 'impossible' is within the realm of what the human body can do, there are Australians who believe that they can do it - and who have succeeded often enough to make us wonder if anything is impossible to them. It means they have never lost a match - particularly a Test match - until the last run is scored or their last wicket down."

Paraphrasing, "You do not say -'We will play Sri Lanka on Tuesday and take it as a consolation win before we go home."

MSD - You need some rest, mate!

Leaving BQ-7 open for one more day to enable those who missed out answering yesterday. Remember the last question carries 5 points.

Siva* (11), Ishan (9.5) and Ganesh Kumar (9) are the top-three including BQ-7.

Remember to send in your Finals guesses for a cracker of a game between the Pommies and Ozzies!!

Ciao.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Where is the party?


First signs of MSD's unravelling. Everybody and his uncle are taking potshots at the Indian team.
Rightly so. But for the wrong reasons.

Long and short is that India will never win anything of worth in T20. The reason is quite simple:

The moment they see India, oppositions are going to do two things:

(1) pack their teams with fast bowlers and give 'em the perfume ball as a staple diet
(2) where possible, give them the liveliest of pitches.

Since it is only four overs that they have to worry about, it is almost impossible to see India crossing 160 consistently. Lesser said about the Indian bowling the better.

MSD and Kumble made pertinent points about the pressures of playing for the franchises - we have seen that happen in soccer; only there the itineraries are much saner and definitely the franchisees do not want their wards to attend/adorn 'must-attend' parties!!

England did a fabulous job at St Lucia thrashing Sri Lanka; it will be a good thing to watch them face off against Australia - two good bowling teams with England holding a slight edge of that 'x' factor.

Answer to BQ-6:

Answer is 98,0,1,0,1.
For the explanations check here.

Anand Re, Siva*, Ganesh Kumar, Ishan (Honest: did this in his econs class at the varsity) gave the right answer.

Here is the last one for this tournament: BQ-7:

A bumper one to round this edition off. There are five boxes given below. Each one contains a puzzle. Each puzzle refers to a common expression that we are all familiar with. Your task is simple. Give me the five expressions that these puzzles refer to. There is no connection between the puzzles.



Send in your entries for:

1. Aus v Pak semis#2 - ALL CAN JOIN - No restrictions! Same rules apply.
2. Finals - ALL CAN JOIN - No restrictions! Same rules apply.
3. Answers to the final quiz question

See you soon.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

A repeat of last year, perhaps?


LoA has to catch up on Australia at some stage; may be the semis! And they were able to leave out Doug Bollinger :-|
England is pretty hot with Yardy doing the hard yards and Swann swooning people around. KP, the new dad is likely to come and play with gay abandon.

India has a new captain. Suresh Raina. Ha Ha Ha!

Suddenly all and sundry seem have remembered Shakespeare: 

"Is this a dagger I see before me? 
The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee!"

Yeah, Dhoni's blue eyes are turning paler slowly.

Answer to BQ-5:

It is not such a devilish problem to NOT give 666 as the answer. Indeed it is the answer. Go figure!

Again a very good response. Anand Re, Bob, Ganesh Kumar, Guru, Letchu (welcome!), Maanasa, Rambo, Shiv and Siva* got it right.  Siva* has answered all the questions and Anand Re, Guru and Ishan are lagging behind by one. 

Let us see if the following cracker - Thanks to Bob, will separate the boys from men.

BQ-6:

A bit long. But quite good, I have to say. Remember the Shooting problem from IPL and its answer? This one goes somewhere along those lines...

There are 5 pirates on a ship, in descending order of seniority, as follows:

Jack (seniormost pirate, Captain)
John (2nd-seniormost)
Jules (3rd-seniormost)
Jim (4th-seniormost)
Joe (juniormost)

They loot a ship and come in possession of a chest with exactly 100 gold coins in it. As the Captain of the ship, Jack has to decide how the 100 gold coins get distributed amongst the 5 of them, without consulting anyone else. Once he announces his distribution decision, all 5 of them (including himself) will vote for/against his decision.

If Jack gets > = 50% of the votes, then his decision stands valid and he remains Captain with honour.
If Jack gets < 50% of the votes, then he is deemded unfit to remain Captain, is beheaded and thrown to the sharks. In that case, John (2nd-seniormost) becomes Captain, and then John has to decide the distribution. John's decision would then be subject to the same voting rule and conditions. If John fails and is killed, Jules becomes the Captain and so on.

Everyone is aware of these rules.

The question is - What should Jack's distribution be, such that:

1) Jack gets the maximum no. of gold coins possible for himself, and
2) Jack remains alive (and thus remains Captain)

There is only one number possible as his maximum limit.

Enjoy your Thursday & send in your entries for the semi#1 + the quiz.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

England vs India, anyone?

Pakistan, yet again, has shown that they can never be written off. Congrats to Afridi and Co.
A grand total of 13 spinning overs contributed to the South African misery. Yet another tournament. Yet another early exit. Yet another Choker tag. They are considering renaming their country as 'Choke Africa'.

Having said that, India is in the usual territory. I am reminded of those meaningless triangular/quadrangular tournaments where we used to do all kinds of calculations to see how India can sneak through to the semis or finals or whatever. Just tells one that life does not change much, IPL or not!! And something tells me that Dhoni again will persist on Jadeja and gift even the 'consolation' win away to Sri Lanka. Heart not in it, perhaps?

Is there a connection between the UK hung parliament and England's resurrection on the field? Or is it because KP has become a father? Never know.

Answer to BQ-4:

Green, of course. A number of you got it right. Somebody even said that the fourth clue is redundant. But I like Subra's succint reply - apart from the fact that he took a long time to explain how he his love for puzzles started - for another post!

To the right of the green bowl is the banana. Therefore the green bowl does not contain bananas
To the right of the star-fruit is the green bowl. Therefore the gree bowl does not contain star-fruit
THEREFORE THE GREEN BOWL MUST CONTAIN THE ORANGE!!!


Anand Re, Bob, Ganesh, Guru, Ishan, Maanasa, Siva*, Subra and Sukanti got the answer right. Good show, fellas!

Now to BQ-5

What is the value of x?


Be good and you know what to do.

Monday, May 10, 2010

New MCC Rule!

Breaking News!

BQ has got the scoop on the latest round of changes to the cricket playing conditions:

ICC, with immediate effect has amended the Law 42.11 as follows: (changes in blue)

42.11. Damaging the pitch - area to be protected


(a) It is incumbent on all players to avoid unnecessary damage to the pitch. It is unfair for any player to cause deliberate damage to the pitch.

(b) An area of the pitch, to be referred to as 'the protected area', is defined as that area contained within a rectangle bounded at each end by imaginary lines parallel to the popping creases and 5ft/1.52m in front of each and on the sides by imaginary lines, one each side of the imaginary line joining the centres of the two middle stumps, each parallel to it and 1ft/30.48cm from it.

(c) In addition, the entire area of the pitch in which the proected area is contained is to be deemed as 'No Pitch' area. Any ball that pitches as part of the bowling action, in the 'No Pitch area' is to be called as a No Ball by the striker's end umpire. The striker's end umpire will indicate the No Ball by tapping his one of the knees with one hand,while the other hand shall be indicating the No Ball signal by extending it out.

(d) Appendix 73 shows the 'No Pitch Area'.

(e) There shall be clear markings on the pitch to indicate the 'No Pitch Area' to enable the umpires to function effectively.

(f) ICC or any other bodies are to mandatorily implement sections (c), (d) and (e) of this rule ONLY in any innings where India bats.

Appendix 73




Now for BQ-4:
 
There are three bowls on a table, each containing different types of fruits.

To the right of the green bowl is the banana.
To the left of the banana is the orange.
To the right of the star-fruit is the green bowl.
To the left of the white bowl is the blue bowl.
What is the colour of the bowl containing the orange?

[Note: The “right” or “left” here do not necessarily refer to the immediate right
nor immediate left.]

Usual place, Usual time.

Have a great week!

Saturday, May 08, 2010

If you can't hook...

After that drubbing by Aus and SL yesterday, India has almost become history. So, something on History for a change...

Harsha Bhogle wrote this.

Apart from Buchanan and Rod Marsh, Singapore's Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew had said the same thing many years ago, to his everything-begins-and-ends-with-marks-educators: "LEARNING OVER TEACHING"

Junior used to mention this more often than not, whenever he was frustrated by his teachers not imparting even the basic knowledge on certain areas so that the wards can go and figure the other stuff themselves. Well do get some bad apples, yeah?

Funny, Harsha mentions learning History - true, it is a mundane thingy in India; mug and regurgitate!

It is precisely with this view that I was approaching Junior's history lessons a few years ago, when he first had the taste of the subject. And in no time, my entire (Indian) notion of history education went out of the window. It was so refreshing that sooner than later Junior was swearing by History and to-date he loves History more than anything else.

Case in point: There was this exercise that the students were asked to do in one of their tests. Remember these are 12-year-olds hardly out of the nappies.

You are to write two-100-word paragraphs about David Beckham - one as a ManU fan (yes, he was playing for them then!) and one as a Liverpool fan. Fine! Your average football fan will go ballistic at such an assignment. But the twist was in the next part of the question. Now wearing a historian's hat, analyse what is right and wrong about the two writeups.
The last part, definitely gave a very good chance to the pupils to put into use what they have learnt about respecting the sources, getting the right perspective of the material, how to achieve a balanced-view from two contrasting pictures etc.. All important for Historians in particular and Humans in general.

Just a thought...

Enough sermonizing.

********************************************************
Answer to BQ-3:

No, it is not what Napoleon told his soldiers before that ill-fated journey towards Russia. It is the Maori war dance that was made famous by the New Zealand All-Blacks Rugby team. Check the Haka here.

Anand Re, Ishan and Siva* got it right. Go do the dance in front of your kids, guys! Ishan: If you don't have one, then the girlfriend is the most obvious choice. ***dread*** ;-))

No quiz question today.

See you tomorrow.

Friday, May 07, 2010

Day of Clinical Reals!


First things first.

  • BQ is a non-profit, non-mandatory, voluntary participation event.
  • You can take part either in the B or the Q part.
  • The winnings are all actually part of a zero sum game.
  • And many a winner from the past events have donated all or part of their winnings to Charity with top-ups from the bank.

So, do not fret. Just go ahead and enjoy the fun!

Having said that, if you missed the bus on the semis line up and would want to join the fun, write to me.

********************************************************
 
It is really Cricket Crazy on Star Sports.
Firstly you have Cyrus the virus (serious offence to the Boman Irani).
Then you have Shonali the snake queen - who follows Gandhiji sartorially speaking - less is more!
And on top, there is Danny Morrison of double-D fame!
Our father in the heaven...


The super-8s started as the Brits are trying to elect a Gardener of Brown stuff or the almost-avatar-director or the one with the nice leg.

And this is the Pakistan that Balasaheb would have loved; as flat as the beer that he likes to drink; spills all over the place; incorrigible running between the wickets; more incorrigible shots... yet, they will come back.

England were clinical, in fact a bit too clinical to my liking. But something in the stiff breezes of the Windies always make the English men mad and my bet is that they would lose their marbles sometime in the next few days - say against NZL!

SA were again, for the lack of a better word, clinical. Southee, after that brilliant catch to dismiss Kallis, made amends by donating all those sixers at the death. After that sleep took over :-)

********************************************************

Answer to BQ-2:

Really a large number of correct answers. If BQ-1 was easy, then this seems to have been downright Primary school stuff. 12, you read it right, twelve people got it right.

Anand Re, Ananth, Bob, Ganesh Kumar, Guru, Ishan, Laks, Maanasa, Saran, Shiv, Siva* & Yadavalli comprise the cricket team that gave the right answer which is 1. Good one, folks.

 
And here is BQ-3:

Hopefully a tricky one...

The rough English translation of a famous exhortation is given below. Which one?

I die. I die.
I live. I live.
I die. I die.
I live. I live.
This is the fierce and powerful man
Who made the sun shine on me again
Up the ladder, Up and Up
The sun shines and Rise!!!


  Be good and send in the entries asap.

PS: Why watch BB McCullum's tattoo when you can enjoy Tata Docomo tattoo ad?


Thursday, May 06, 2010

Super-8, Here We Come!


The chaff has been separated from the grain - though I have to say that England is high on the chaff-o-meter; if England had had two full games, then life would have been interesting. Funny, Ireland seems to be complaining about D/L method - somebody: please tell them that D/L comes into picture only after five overs. Whining - a favourite British Isles pastime :-}

Group E: England, New Zealand, Pakistan and South Africa
Group F: Australia, India, Sri Lanka and West Indies

Afghanistan were first Stenyed, then Mortared Morkeled and subsequently Veldted. Almost all of the Afghani batsmen while facing the ball were initially moving towards... square-leg; almost like my ill-advised attempt many years ago to pick up the cricket bat again! Liquid pace :-|

Interesting to note that India has to play its next two games at Barbados and even a normal bouncer on that wicket seems to be going above the head! I see a repeat of 2009 WC T20 for the Indians!

Get ready to send in your 
  • semi-finals line up & 
  • today's matches guesses. 
By 8.59 pm SGT please.

Answer to BQ-1:

There is nothing wrong with that dismissal. It seems weird that a batsman has gotten out stumped and yet is marked as not having faced a ball.

Guru, Siva*, Yadavalli, Subra, Ishan got it right. Pollard was stumped off a wide. I have not given credit to those answers which said that he was out off a no-ball on three counts. (a) You can't be stumped off a no-ball (2) A no-ball is added to the batsman's balls-faced count and most important, (iii) if I were to commit that mistake on the field, then I will be quartered and strung high by all and sundry!

Good start to the quiz. Keep it up, fellas.

Now for BQ-2:

How high will Shonali Nagrani go in her daring baring attempt?


No erase that. I said that the grey cells will be exercised. Did I not?

In the grid shown below, each square is filled with number 1, 2, 3, 4 or 5 in such a way that no row, column or the two main diagonal lines contain the same number more than once. Find the value of x.




To usual place by usual time. Hafun!

PS1: By the way, I like Kabir Khan's dress code - In a suit and tie; a la Football manager. Refreshing!!
PS2: Have you heard of the expression "Behind the Eight Ball"?

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

WCT20 - BQ is on!!


As promised, the next edition of BQ is back.

Before we go on to the rules, here are my two-paise worth observations over the happenings in the Carribean...
  • India is flattering... hope they don't deceive!
  • England is at their favourite sport again... whining!
  • South Africa is making the right noises... choke, cough, choke!
  • Australia almost did the impossible of losing six in six against Pakis. Still five out of six is creditable:-) Ominous!
  • Cheerleaders are scary. Yes, I am racist! What kind of guys chose those colours - cyan and mithai pink...You can see the impact of these colours on this post :-)) Mr Ambani: Here is my opthalmologist's bill...

BQ is on. Here is the first one.

BQ-1:


What seems to be wrong here? How is it possible?
An easy one to warm up those grey cells.

***********************
 
Now for the B- part:

Rules are pretty much same.

Moolah involved: 
Minimum 30 bucks

That gives you:
  • one semi-finals line up guess (5 bucks) and
  • any eight matches from super-8 till finals (3 bucks each) and
  • one buck worth of Quiz prize money
Please note that there are a total of 15 matches from Super-8 till finals. So you can pick and choose.

Would appreciate if at least 10 get involved in the B-part; Naheen to majaa naheen hai!

* You are free to exceed this minimum by guessing the results of more games and more semis line up guesses etc.
* But if you intend taking part part in the BQ, then you commit to the minimum set of numbers mentioned above.
* Final winners give a commitment of donating at least 10% of their winnings towards charity. (I know, I know, almost all the winners from last time have donated it to charity Thanks to them! :-))

Framework upto Semi-Finals:


1. Send in the semi-finals line-up. [Winners and Runners of Groups E and F]

To be sent in by 8:59 pm SGT, Thursday 6th May 2010

1. There are five things that you need to respond for each game:
Winning team, Winning Run Margin, Winning Wicket Margin, Max number of wickets by which team, Number of Sixers in the match

2. Please send in all your entries by 8:59pm SGT everyday to lnspatta@gmail.com
3. Please ensure that you give both the winning ranges: run-margin & wicket-margin
4. Please do not invent your own margins; stick to the published ranges shown below
5. If you are using Excel to track your guesses, when you cut-and-paste, please use Rich Text for pasting; the PCX format is painful from gmail.

Run Margin Ranges:

Between 1 to 20 runs (both inclusive)
Between 21 to 40 runs (both inclusive)
Between 41 to 60 runs (both inclusive)
Above 61 runs (61 and Infinity inclusive)


Wicket Margin Ranges:

By 1 to 3 wickets (both inclusive)
By 4 to 5 wickets (both inclusive)
By 6 to 8 wickets (both inclusive)
By 9 to 10 wickets (both inclusive)


Which team will take the most number of wickets in the match?

Either of the team names OR Same

Number of Sixers (No, not DLF Maximums!!) in the MATCH:

0-3 (both inclusive)
4-7 (both inclusive)

8-11 (both inclusive)
12++

(btw, BQ stands for Bets and Quiz; what to do, we are like Brits only!)